|
Home
Welcome Back
Women's History
Greek System
420
Psycho Mike
Religion
Greg's Return
RIP Mike and Ben
|
|
[Myles's
remarks are large, blue and in Italic brackets, like
this.]
Originally aired Monday,
May 8th 2000.
[Heckman's
to blame for this one... the episode was indeed written on
the infamous High Holy Day, and we took the crazy ideas we
came up with under the influence and made all our wildest
dreams come true.]
|
Introduction:
|
|
|
|
|
Our
promotions head makes her on-air debut with a
short and darling description of her previous
night's dream.
Featuring:
Ceci
Mak
|
[I
never told anybody this before, but the first person ever to
utter the phrase that Ceci says here was my friend Tim
Carroll from back home when asked about his dreams for the
future. And I co-opted it. Ha ha ha.]
Opening
credits
[Mike's
last comments allude to a hilarious digression that didn't
make it into the episode in which we speculate about Herbert
Nasa, who invented NASA and named it after himself. "Have a
looksee" is always funny.]
|
Doggies
and Kitties in Space!:
|
|
|
|
|
A movie
trailer for the up-coming feature film which
combines the best elements of "Space Camp" and
"Milo and Otis."
Featuring:
Mike's
kittie, Rebecca's
puppy, Myles
Nye
(voice)
|
[My
girlfriend thinks this the funniest skitch in Mike and Ben's
history. Space matte and alien landscape courtesy of
Tim.]
|
Quelling
the Rebellion:
|
|
|
|
|
After
viewing the summer 1998 runaway art-house
blockbuster "Small
Soldiers," Jessica decides to nip any potential
toy rebellions in the bud.
Featuring:
Jessica
Moss
Next
Clip >
|
[We
were at Tim's apartment for the meeting, and my wandering
eye landed on a videotape of "Small Soldiers"-- you know,
the one that's like "Toy Story" only completely bad.. God
only knows why they have this movie on tape, but this is
what popped into my head.]
|
General
Manager Announcement:
|
|
|
|
|
UCLA TV's
technical advisor pulls consonants out of a hat
to find wacky alternative spellings for lesser
countries, drinks a few sips of vodka, and just
looks all around fabulous in a glamorous
dress.
Featuring:
Rizwan
Kassim
|
[Originally,
Rizwan was going to be wearing a dress and reading out loud
from The Comic Toolbox, a book he ordered from
Amazon.com to learn how to be funny. Thor had his own vision
for the piece, however. Canada was only one of the countries
that he re-named, but this episode ran really long. Or maybe
it just seemed that way because of all the dope we
smoked.]
|
Quelling
the Rebellion Continued:
|
|
|
|
|
Jessica
proceeds to put the rest of her toys in a
clothes dryer.
Featuring:
Jessica
Moss
<
Previous Clip
|
|
Young
Man Finds a Bag of "Demon Weed" in a Vending
Machine:
|
|
|
|
|
In the
style of early 20th century silent nickelodeon
films, a young man
discovers and purchases some ganja in a common
vending machine.
Featuring:
Tim
Heiderich
|
[More
proof that Tim doesn't need any friends, just his computer
and a whole lot of nickels.]
|
I
Love My Vagina:
|
|
|
|
|
Our
producer declares his love for his vagina in
several public places around UCLA and he gives
his vagina a chance to voice its feelings as
well. His clitoris and a piece of foreign
material also chime in.
Featuring:
Sean
Heckman,
Mike
Pesses
(voice), Myles
Nye
(voice), Sean
Hart
(voice)
|
[I
have this nightmare that this show is going to have a
revival in 20 years or so and I will be known solely as "the
guy who was the voice of Sean Heckman's
clitoris."]
[Tim
seems awfully good at this. Hmmm.]
[This
piece was less like satire and more like
documentary.]
|
Kaiser
Von Sök, Evil Genius:
|
|
|
|
|
A
menacing sock puppet with a German accent and a
World War I Kaiser hat tries to enroll at UCLA
and meets some interesting characters along the
way.
Featuring:
Tim
Heiderich
(voice and wrist)
|
[What
other TV show has the courage, I ask you? Upright Citizens'
Brigade can go spin.]
|
Tap
Dancing to the Sounds of Fecalphiliac
Pornography:
|
|
|
|
|
Tap
dancing to the sounds of fecalphiliac
pornography. What were you expecting?
Featuring:
Myles
Nye
(feet and voice), Jessica
Moss
(voice), Tim
Heiderich
(sound effects)
|
[The
piece that drove Sean Hart's sister from the room. Early in
the year, before I even really knew who he was, Price sent
an E-mail to everybody with a video clip of some disgusting
Swedish caca porno with this woman making these unearthly
noises. We wanted to lift the audio track and use it in this
piece, but we couldn't get the damn thing to work, so we
dilligently cooked up our own. The world has never been the
same.]
|
The
Girl From Ipanema:
|
|
|
|
|
Part four
of four. In the saga's bizarre conclusion, Mike
opts not to dial 911, but rather to eat the dead
girl's poop. Questions for discussion
follow.
Featuring:
Mike
Pesses,
Roberta
Brodsky
<
Previous Clip
|
[I
think Mike clutching his temples is an excellent touch. The
questions for discussion make the
piece.]
|
4/20
Writers Meeting Sequence #7:
|
|
|
|
|
The most
productive writers meeting ever winds down with
lots of hugs and warm fuzzies, as is revealed
all the writers were only pretending to be
wasted. The only person who was actually under
the influence was the producer.
Featuring:
Sean
Heckman,
Myles
Nye,
Rizwan
Kassim,
Sean
Hart,
et al
<
Previous Clip
|
[This
took forever, but by golly it was worth it. The same bag of
62 real Snickers bars, in two different sizes, plus digital
enhancement courtesy of Rizwan, makes for a sugar-coated
fantasy land that really satisfies you. Or maybe only
me.]
|
Closing
credits:
|
|
|
|
|
Strangely,
this episode features no closing credits but
rather an aggressive title card directing any
complaints to Noah Bookman.
|
I don't really
want to read
the E-mails about this
episode,
but the devil says I have to.
Pass that thing
and go back
to the top
|
